Dreaming of dropping my son and taking care of four-year-olds

A friend asked me this week if I have dropped David yet. This is one of the most empathetic and insightful questions that I have been asked so far. The answer, of course is "no," but it is something that I think about ALL THE TIME. I try to take reasonable precautions and stay relaxed about it. I remind myself that, while dropping the baby is not good, it is not the end of the world. I am sure that many babies have been dropped and lived to tell about it if only in simple stuttering monosyllables. But I have had two horribly vivid dreams about dropping him. In the first, he fell out of his improperly fastened car seat as we were leaving the hospital. In another, he fell asleep on top of his mom and then rolled off on to the floor. Since he was born I have had frequent weird anxiety dreams, but dropping the baby dreams are certainly the worst.

Someday David will be four, which I think is my favorite age. Four-year-olds are charming. They have mastered communication well enough to carry on a conversation, but they are still as innocent as the angels. I have
recently been in the company of some four-year-olds at work. I read a story to one and then we wrestled. The other needed some help with the various stages of going to the bathroom and his mom was busy, so he asked me. He only knew me as the guy that wouldn't let him run in the gallery, but he couldn't get his pants back up and I have obviously mastered getting pants up, so it made sense to him to ask me. It was charming. Any younger, and he would have not had the skill to even try the potty without mom; any older and he will not need the help and will know not to ask strangers. It is sad. I love talking to little kids, and I really want my son to be able to talk to strangers, to feel comfortable sharing and asking for assistance, but I know that it simply is not a safe proposition. I know that sometime around age four, I will have to teach him not to talk to strangers, but I am very glad that when these little boys needed attention from someone, I was the stranger at hand.