perspective

Yesterday I tried to start potty training David. I was determined to be a "good" mother and not turn the TV on and diligently work with him on going potty in the potty. I even refused to put pull-ups on him and made sure a large stack of underwear was handy.

My game plan was to keep him in rooms lacking carpet which means keep him out of the living room. So we set up shop in the kitchen and the first time he peed on the floor it was no big deal. Clorox the spot, new undies, on with playing. The second time he peed I was annoyed but no big deal because it was in his room, Clorox the spot, new undies, on with the morning.

The Third time he peed I was at the end of my rope as it wasn't even noon yet. And this time he did it on the carpet. Occasionally David can sense when Jason and I are so angry he decides to stay out of our way and obey any request made of him. Well this was one of those times so he played quietly in his room the rest of the morning as I cleaned and rushed to get ready for work.

By the time I got to work I was completely defeated with the potty training after only a morning (yes I am a pathetic mother) and depressed because my gifted child just didn't get it (or seem to care that he had peed on himself all morning).

Today a co-worker was telling me about her weekend. She has three small children and on Sunday while mom was working and dad was sleeping the kids decided to turn the house into a swimming pool. Literally. They took all the Tupperware out of the cabinets and proceeded to flood almost every room with water. The beds were soaked clear through, water was a half inch deep in some places and the couch was soaked.

Lets just say I don't feel so bad about a small pee spot on the carpet now.

Veda Mae Gilbert, Memory Eternal

I haven't written since Tuesday even though there has been a lot to write about--Simon is laughing and David drew his first self portrait. But it seemed disrespectful to not first write about a great loss in our family.

Our phone rang at 3:00 am last Tuesday morning. As I made my way to the phone, I prayed that it was a wrong number. No one wants the kind of phone call you get at 3:00 am. It was not a wrong number. It was That call. It was about my grandmother. She collapsed earlier that evening and was ambulanced to the hospital. I spoke with the nurse later on. He said that she was conscious, awake, and communicating. Then, he turned around to do some paper work, and when he turned back, she was gone.

The week since then has been one long hectic day of coordinating arranging, crying, consoling, and wandering around in a disbelieving stupor. The funeral was Friday. She was buried on Sunday.

During the sharing portion of the memorial service, I said something like this:

Veda was a person with a very strong sense of right and wrong. She had great moral clarity and was also very outspoken making her, at times, somewhat opinionated. Her sense of right and wrong was so strong that she could actually be hurt when she saw someone making wrong choices.

This could be a little difficult to deal with because there are many times in my life when we disagreed about right and wrong and didn't feel like she should feel injured by my decision. Of course she was very often correct, but sometimes, we simply had to disagree and deal with it. Somewhere in my teens I realized that if I was making a decision for myself that Veda would not take kindly to, the best approach was the direct one. Be straight, assume she is an adult that can handle the truth, and tell her what is going on. When I did this, she wasn't shy about letting me know where I was wrong, but she never wavered in her love and acceptance of me.

Because of this, I learned what unconditional love looks like. When I eventually recognized that in another woman, I married her. Veda also taught me that integrity is the best course. Be honest and direct and let the chips fall where they may. These lessons have served me very well and kept me more-or-less on a straight path--or I at least return to that path eventually. I never consider two options in my life without thinking about what Veda and Gib would think about it--they are my own personal "what would Jesus do?".

In the course of the visitation, funeral, burial, visits to the house, calls, cards, and online condolences, we heard from over 400 people over the last week. I know that the majority of these who knew Veda personally also saw in some measure this sense of morality combined with love that I saw. I know it touched and guided them too. I know that all of us will continue to be guided by Veda and that her memory will be eternal.

Hawk Eye

Unlike David, Simon is all eyes. He'll watch you walk by, he'll watch you leave the house, he'll even watch you watching tv.

The one thing he really keeps an eye out for is David.

My guess is he's already figured out you must always stay alert to the possibility of being attacked by the over abundant love David has for all of us.

At times it can be quite painful.

mastication

So, I had four teeth pulled out of my head today. Apparently, I've been trying to cram 32 teeth into a 28-tooth mouth. Next time someone tells me I have a big mouth, I'm coming after them with pliers. We pulled them because I'm getting braces--time to straighten them all out. It will be strange having straight teeth. I'm looking forward to it.

The ones we yanked are the first premolars, also called the bicuspids. They are the double-pointed teeth right behind your cuspids--your canines. Today, I've learned what they are for--eating. Your wedge-like incisors, front and center, are for tearing vegetable matter, your big, flat molars at the back are for crushing nuts and seeds, and your cuspids are for battling rivals in your territory. But once the vegetables have been torn, the seeds crushed, and the rivals vanquished, basic chewing seems to fall to the first and second bicuspids. I discovered this today by trying to chew a piece of soft cheese--something that needs neither tearing, crushing, nor vanquishing. I couldn't do it. it just rattled around in the space where my teeth used to be. It's a weird feeling and has reduced me to eating only foods that I can masticate between my tongue and the roof of my mouth. I assume that a solution will present itself before I wither away.

socialite

Two of David's favorite people in the world are Naomi (~16) and Sarah (~13), sisters who go to our church. They have three other sisters whom David also loves dearly. He talks about them before church, he stands with them during church, and he talks about them on the way home from church. Jaime and I were supposed to have a meeting after church on Sunday and we told David that he would be going to the girls' house to hang out and be sat. Thrilled. Unfortunately, the weather obligated us to cancel the meeting so David didn't need to go over. He was crushed, but we told him that Naomi might come over the next day to take pictures of him for a school project. "Will Sarah come too?" This is all he talked about the rest of the night.

Fortunately, Naomi and Sarah did come over the next day for a little glamor shoot. David was in heaven. I think he showed them and explained every single toy he owns. He even offered Naomi a seat in his chair. When she explained that she didn't think she'd fit, he assured her "I think your butt is small enough."

Socially, Monday was a big day for him. After Naomi and Sarah, left, we visited the Eakes-Kahns to share in the twins' Christmas bounty--"share" being a negotiable word for all three boys. He had fun. Every day since, he has done his past/future inversion, talking at length about how we are going to go to Alexander and Sebastian's, describing what has already happened with anticipation. Then, he sinks when I explain that we are not going over tonight. Everyday. Day.

Oh yeah, here's proof:

comparison

People regularly tell us that Simon is beginning to look more and more like David. Below is a recent photo of Simon with a 4-month photo of David for comparison. I'll let you decide for yourself (that it is not true).



And a solo for good measure.



Later, compliant fans

order up

Granny Great says:

I don't think you noticed the other night, but David picked up a "Steak & Shake" ad and asked me what I would like. I told him the salad. He pointed to it and said he would take a hamburger and french fries. I showed him a picture of a new yogurt milk shake they had and he said, "I'll take a yogurt milk shake too!" He was serious about the whole thing.

ideas of the day # 234982, 642322, and 8202243

I think Mac is going to lose this lawsuit with Cisco over the iPhone trademark. Just a hunch. A couple months ago, I read a blogger who speculated that there was no way Mac would abandon the iPod name recognition and that they would call the product something like "iPod, with mobile." My suggestion: iGo. Do you have Steve Job's number?

On the news this morning, they were previewing what stories were coming up in the next 30 min. One was about "smart" elevators that are transforming the way elevators operate. I said to myself: "Hmmm, smart elevator. Elevators should have a central console for all of the elevators in a bank on each floor. Riders enter the floor that they want to get to on the console and it tells them which elevator they need to go to. Programming would group riders for fewer stops." Sure enough, that is exactly how they work. That was the fastest realization of an idod evar. Add to this a key-bob or cell-phone activation so you can even bypass the console.

Idod3: Workout videos for moms that include cartoon/Sesame Street Characters so the toddlers can watch along allowing parents to get in a workout without ignoring the offspring.

idea of the day: averting dis-aster

From: Jason Gilbert
To: 'RK'
Subject: idea of the day--averting dis-aster

Two steps to be completed over the course of the next couple of decades. Step 1: Perfect infrared technology so that every car windshield is equipped with it, everyone owns the equipment to see infrared, and that equipment is light and easy to use. Step 2: replace all street lights porch lights, yard lights, and head lights with infrared "lighting" (projectors). Exclude the lighting that architects use to make the exteriors of their buildings look pretty at night so we don't have to hear them whine.
Step three: walk out in a night reclaimed by darkness and look up at the stars. This would actually be SAFER at night because we could really saturate the cities with infrared lighting that appears much brighter than what is currently acceptable with public lighting.

We would have to do an environmental impact study on animals that can see the longer wavelengths, but I assume it would be less than the impact of our current daylight-at-night situation. Of course certain areas wouldn't do this--like Time's Square--but if we could eliminate 80-90% of the current lighting, we could see the stars again.

From: RK
To: 'Jason Gilbert'
Subject: RE: idea of the day--averting dis-aster

IDOD:

Go camping.

From: Jason Gilbert [mailto:jgilbert@allenpress.com]
To: 'RK'
Subject: RE: idea of the day--averting dis-aster

OK, not a recreational issue. I am trying to eliminate light pollution and create an environment where the night sky, and the darkness of night in general, are a part of our lives again.

punk.

From:RK
To: 'Jason Gilbert'
Subject: RE: idea of the day--averting dis-aster

If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not live according to the truth; but if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. (1 John 1:6-7 RSV)

guess we better rename it EDOD: EVIL idea of the day.

From: Jason Gilbert [mailto:jgilbert@allenpress.com]
To: 'RK'
Subject: RE: idea of the day--averting dis-aster

dude, God can so see in infrared. So, since my idea actually increases the amount of "light" even though we can't see it, it is a spiritual improvement over the current situation.

From:RK
To: 'Jason Gilbert'
Subject: RE: idea of the day--averting dis-aster

ah, i see. and i retract as well, because evil things have to be backwards of good things. so an evil IDOD is just Dodi. if you see one walking down the street you can say “howdy, dodi!”

rollin'

I keep forgetting to tell you, Simon has been rolling over from his front to his back since Monday!

He is sick again. It's a head cold with a fever. A physician that Jaime works with informed her that when a child as young as Simon gets RSV (which Simon had a couple of weeks ago), it can permanently increase their susceptibility to respiratory problems in the future. Nevertheless, he is still generally quiet and content--he just sounds like Darth Vader.

In other news, Jaime bought David some of those woofle-ball clogs that the kids are wearing these days. I'll let Dooce do my griping for me.

word of the day

Jaime just left me a message: The word of the day is "caperon" (rhymes with "apron"). This is a magical apron that, if worn properly, allows you to fly.

12 days of christmas

For your enjoyment on this, the ninth day of Christmas:

The twelve days of social work case management as preformed by Jaime
On the 12th day of Christmas, my social worker gave to me:

12 Rolling walkers
11 ER visits
10 Round trip cab rides
9 Days of hospice
8 Oxygen tanks
7 Community referrals
6 Chamber pots
5 Crisis stablization days
4 Days of rehab
3 Nebulizers
2 Free wound vacs
And a month of free prescription pills!

idea of the day: radio purchase

Idea of the day: while listening to you car radio, you can press a "buy now" button when you hear a song. The mp3 file is emailed to your computer and the dollar is deducted from your credit card.

I came up with this while listening to my "Yahoo!" station on Jaime's computer and folding laundry. "Buy now" is a Yahoo! feature, but I can't use it because the DRM is not compatible with my mp3 player of choice.