terror reloaded

The old mild alarment:

• stand on landing
• place both hands on the second step, knees on the first step.
• hands on the third step, knees on the second step
• repeat until the top is reached.

The new terror

• stand up on the first step, turn to the banister
• gripping the banister and spindles, put the forward foot up on the next step
• pull trailing foot up to the step
• repeat
• occasionally, slip, catching self with hands and feet LIKE SOME SORT OF MOUNTAIN CLIMBER WHILE YOUR FATHER'S HEART STOPS